Have you ever felt the 'sting' of hurt feelings after talking with a therapist, friend, family member, or person(s) in a support group? Did I hear a "Yes" to that (at one time or another)?. Something that has helped me has been somebody reminding me not to be a sponge when listening to others. You've probably heard it said a thousand times before (I know I have), to "take in what fits, and let the rest roll off of your back".
One therapist I saw (while my regular one was out ill) mentioned "Just stop feeling sorry for yourself and count your blessings". ...........I was fortunate enough to have another one (with a Phd at that, for whatever that counts for) to call (free)...(how to do that also....coming soon). This therapist (along with my own, later on) tells me..."I cannot believe that you were told that!!"...."She just didn't really know you". Moral of the story: Other people have their 'baggage, bad moods, can be opinionated, and/or make un-educated snap-judgements.....and......to 'not be a sponge', absorbing everything people say as fact. Yes, sometimes the truth hurts, but often it is not the truth.....
On a lighter note....things get so much better over time. Just don't do anything crazy (even if you feel like it). Things will be o.k. I've experienced (among countless others with depression) that things have a way of working out. (the quote at the bottom of this post).
A last note tonight about depression support groups: If a support group listing states that it is for a type of depression that you don't feel you're experiencing, depression is depression. It does not discriminate, and you can get support, even if the group is not specific to your type of it. Be it bio-chemical, bi-polar, inherited, from grief/loss, situational (such as financial, homelessness or near-homelessness), fear, or any other type/cause of depression, try to get your feet to move yourself to any type of depression related meeting. There's also Worldwide Emotions Anonymous physical/in-person, online, & phone meetings, among others, to attend. Some current Emotions Anonymous site language translations are available in Espanol, Swedish, Japanese, French, German, among others at the above link (scroll down on page). Here's The link to the U.S. & Worldwide Emotions Anonymous Meeting Locator.
**I added a 'poll' on the side of the page, asking things like if you'd like a chat room here, among other selections to choose from.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Depression Support Groups..A Good Fit Cont.
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Depression Support Groups...Finding a 'Good Fit'
When visiting any 'online' or 'physical' (in-person) support groups (not only depression-related):
I've found it helpful to keep in mind that different groups can have a different overall 'flavor', atmosphere, and/or level of feeling of intimacy to it. Try another instead of saying "I'll never go to another one again"...you will find one to fit your 'style', personality, and situation.
Any group can have 'off nights', as well as 'on nights'. If you visit a particular group and you feel as if it is a complete waste of time, or that you feel far more depressed for visiting it....check back again, and don't throw the 'baby out with the bathwater' as the saying goes.
Taking the time to give a particular group a chance, and yourself a chance to get to know some of the people and what they can offer usually pays off. Try to avoid 'snap judgements'...it might result in robbing yourself of some valuable 'input', 'feedback', support, and resources.
In the beginning, take some time to 'get the feel' of the support group, by listening and taking things in more than disclosing a lot right away (if able to & not in immediate crisis).
Last but not least....ask about (or read, if online support group) about confidentiality. If it is an online support group, at first anyway, you might use a 'pen-name'. I'll be doing a seperate post very soon on confidentiality and reporting practices.
Oh another last but not least: as the 12-step saying goes....try to remember "Principles before personalities" when listening to others, or reading their words online.
Sorry for the 'not so brief-as-I-planned-post', and will sign-off. Hang in there, and please post here if you have any individualized questions, comments, etc.
Until manana,
~R
*A resource for tonight if it 'fits':
Depression Support Group Locator
Another quick post for tonight with the link to a great (free) U.S. wide depression support group locator from the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance. Here is the link (click below):
Care to Introduce Yourself?
Richard Robert Mosely here, just inviting all to take a moment to say 'hi', and say as much or as little about yourself to share with others.
Myself? You can find a link to my profile (not entirely completed yet) on the left hand side of the blog. My type of personal depression has primarily been from losses experienced (more to be revealed soon). On the other side of the fence, I've worked as a therapist for many years with others having struggles of all types. I love animals, guitar, web-design, different cultures, rainforest preservation, among others.
I've had my times of not being able to get out of bed until afternoon (if it all on some days). Thoughts of all kinds have 'raced through my head' during times of trial. Have tried and continue to count blessings, not 'nurture' bad thoughts, but to 'change channels' as much as possible when they occur, and to take steps towards progress.
Enough about me! How about you? I'm making this blog open to all, without need for registering to read and post, and recommend using a 'pen-name' for confidentiality. Hoping you find your visit(s) here helpful, and that you feel up to contributing questions, comments, poetry, etc.!
~Welcome...Upcoming Events here~
Just a word of welcome. I'll be making another post following this one, with a bit more information about a personal experience or two of mine. Tomorrow, (if not this evening), I'll be adding a link to an excellent locator for depression support groups in your own area.
Upcoming postings will include my experience with 'Finding a support group that is a good fit', 'Different Types of 'Depression support groups', & 'Confidentiality' in depression support groups, individual therapy, and support groups overall.
My hope is that you will also share your experiences, poems, resources, and anything else that you feel like sharing, and that this may become a type of depression support group itself.
There is hope and a light at the end of the tunnel~
R~